My GRL 2012 Experience
Posted by Jeff Erno on Sunday, November 11, 2012
Last year when I attended the first annual GayRomLit Retreat in New
Orleans, I felt privileged to have experienced it. Upon departure, I was
already looking forward to the next year’s conference. And now, a full
year later, the retreat is again over and I’m starting to anticipate GRL
2013.
This year’s retreat was bigger and better than our first year together. I’m pretty sure I’m not alone when I say how genuinely impressed I was by how well the activities were organized, how tastefully everything was presented, and how smoothly we transitioned through multiple events which seemed to be seamlessly connected.
As with the first retreat, I was awestruck at meeting some of my favorite m/m authors. I felt, at times, like I should be pinching myself. And equally as thrilling was the experience of meeting many of my own readers and receiving their feedback face-to-face. I’m amazed every single time someone comes up to me and informs me they’ve read one of my books. It’s truly a humbling experience.
Of course I was saddened by the fact that not everyone I’d hoped to see was able to attend. It isn’t easy for most of us to plan these trips—and as much as we all want to get together, for some it just isn’t possible. During the course of the year there were times when I feared I’d have to myself cancel. Those who did not attend were not forgotten. The publishers spotlighted the works of many authors, some present and some absent.
When I first began reading gay-themed books, I was in my early twenties, and there were a few incredible books, yet they were few and far between. The Best Little Boy In the World, Reflections of a Rock Lobster, and the Tales of the City series were books I read and re-read, and the idea that one day there were be an entire genre that featured gay-themed stories was unimaginable.
For two decades I harbored stories in my head that I couldn’t share. I fantasized about gay romances by switching the gender of some of my favorite fictional and movie characters. I never thought I’d see the day when thousands of books about male-male love were available.
I think many other m/m book lovers understand what I mean when I talk about the joy of discovery we experience when we first step into the m/m romance community. It’s like being a kid in a candy store. It’s very easy to over-indulge, and the rush we feel when we get our HEA is equivalent to that of a sugar high. The passion that we share for m/m is a feeling we cannot easily explain to outsiders, but our love of gripping male-male stories doesn’t seem to diminish over time.
The Internet has allowed us to celebrate our mutual passion by connecting with others who are like ourselves. We’ve gotten to know one another through Goodreads, yahoo groups, Facebook, blogs, and review sites. These connections, though virtual, are real to us, and the friendships we’ve established online are often as meaningful as the in-the-flesh connections of our daily lives.
To me, the opportunity to congregate with others who understand my passion for m/m is exciting and gratifying. I’m proud to be a part of the genre while at the same time humbled by the fact that I’ve been fortunate enough to share my stories with others. While it is thrilling to showcase some of the work I’ve completed over the past year, the GRL experience is about so much more than self-promotion. If promotion were the objective, this would not necessarily be the perfect venue. I’m a very small fish in a huge pond, and my small degree of success is eclipsed by those far more prolific and/or talented. Honestly, I’m grateful for the opportunity to merely be a part of the celebration.
GRL grants us a stage, and we all have our roles. I’m just as honored to be a Munchkin as I would be playing the Wizard. GRL is about the connection we share. It is about our squeals of delight when we’re reunited with our friends and m/m family members we haven’t seen in twelve months. It’s about the storytelling and the humor and the hugs and kisses. It’s about the confirmation—the reminder—that we are not alone, that we have a shared passion.
And GRL provides opportunities to build new relationships, make new friends, and to put a face to the names of those we communicate with throughout the year.
Saying goodbye is bittersweet. It’s hard to believe it’s over already, yet at the same time we can look forward in anticipation of our next reunion. And we can return to our homes with renewed energy and focus, eager to write and read more amazing m/m romances. And that is what the GRL experience means to me.
This year’s retreat was bigger and better than our first year together. I’m pretty sure I’m not alone when I say how genuinely impressed I was by how well the activities were organized, how tastefully everything was presented, and how smoothly we transitioned through multiple events which seemed to be seamlessly connected.
As with the first retreat, I was awestruck at meeting some of my favorite m/m authors. I felt, at times, like I should be pinching myself. And equally as thrilling was the experience of meeting many of my own readers and receiving their feedback face-to-face. I’m amazed every single time someone comes up to me and informs me they’ve read one of my books. It’s truly a humbling experience.
Of course I was saddened by the fact that not everyone I’d hoped to see was able to attend. It isn’t easy for most of us to plan these trips—and as much as we all want to get together, for some it just isn’t possible. During the course of the year there were times when I feared I’d have to myself cancel. Those who did not attend were not forgotten. The publishers spotlighted the works of many authors, some present and some absent.
When I first began reading gay-themed books, I was in my early twenties, and there were a few incredible books, yet they were few and far between. The Best Little Boy In the World, Reflections of a Rock Lobster, and the Tales of the City series were books I read and re-read, and the idea that one day there were be an entire genre that featured gay-themed stories was unimaginable.
For two decades I harbored stories in my head that I couldn’t share. I fantasized about gay romances by switching the gender of some of my favorite fictional and movie characters. I never thought I’d see the day when thousands of books about male-male love were available.
I think many other m/m book lovers understand what I mean when I talk about the joy of discovery we experience when we first step into the m/m romance community. It’s like being a kid in a candy store. It’s very easy to over-indulge, and the rush we feel when we get our HEA is equivalent to that of a sugar high. The passion that we share for m/m is a feeling we cannot easily explain to outsiders, but our love of gripping male-male stories doesn’t seem to diminish over time.
The Internet has allowed us to celebrate our mutual passion by connecting with others who are like ourselves. We’ve gotten to know one another through Goodreads, yahoo groups, Facebook, blogs, and review sites. These connections, though virtual, are real to us, and the friendships we’ve established online are often as meaningful as the in-the-flesh connections of our daily lives.
To me, the opportunity to congregate with others who understand my passion for m/m is exciting and gratifying. I’m proud to be a part of the genre while at the same time humbled by the fact that I’ve been fortunate enough to share my stories with others. While it is thrilling to showcase some of the work I’ve completed over the past year, the GRL experience is about so much more than self-promotion. If promotion were the objective, this would not necessarily be the perfect venue. I’m a very small fish in a huge pond, and my small degree of success is eclipsed by those far more prolific and/or talented. Honestly, I’m grateful for the opportunity to merely be a part of the celebration.
GRL grants us a stage, and we all have our roles. I’m just as honored to be a Munchkin as I would be playing the Wizard. GRL is about the connection we share. It is about our squeals of delight when we’re reunited with our friends and m/m family members we haven’t seen in twelve months. It’s about the storytelling and the humor and the hugs and kisses. It’s about the confirmation—the reminder—that we are not alone, that we have a shared passion.
And GRL provides opportunities to build new relationships, make new friends, and to put a face to the names of those we communicate with throughout the year.
Saying goodbye is bittersweet. It’s hard to believe it’s over already, yet at the same time we can look forward in anticipation of our next reunion. And we can return to our homes with renewed energy and focus, eager to write and read more amazing m/m romances. And that is what the GRL experience means to me.


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